Tonight was Aubrey's Christmas Concert for her preschool. I am telling you that stand-up comedy is not as funny as this concert! We were laughing the entire program and so were all the other people in the audience. There was a crazy kid who kept dancing the robot and armpit farting; a REALLY tall spazzy girl who kept jumping up to try to touch the microphone; some kids who didn't sing but sobbed; some who had total blank looks on their faces the entire time; and some who kept doing Blue Steel looks for their families that were waving at them in the audience. It was a hilarious night! I even met someone who doesn't have kids in the school but they go to the show because it's always funny! LOVED IT!
BUT, on a sad note. Aubrey was very excited about getting to wear her fancy dress. I even asked her if she'd like for me to curl her hair. She said, "Oh yes, and I think I should wear my fancy shoes." So, this afternoon after nap time I curl her hair. I did a GOOD job too. I sectioned it all out, used hairspray before and after I did each curl. She look beautiful, more beautiful that she has even looked in her young life! As I'm looking at her with such awe, I tell her, "Since this is a special occasion, you can wear some perfume." Pssshht, I spray some RIGHT IN HER EYE!!! What a loser of a mom! She immediately starts screaming and crying that she can't see and her eye is hurting. She's rubbing it like crazy. It's turning red and puffy. Then she realizes that she also got some in her mouth and starts gagging like she's about to puke. AND WHAT DO I SAY? "Don't puke on your dress or in your pretty hair!!!" It was one of those out of body moments where I could look down on myself and this scene and shake my head at myself. Of all the things I could or should have said, I picked the most vain one!
Of course, I change my tune and start apologizing like crazy and trying to relieve her pain. After about 15-20 minutes, she calms down, but it still unable to keep her eyes open for very long. BUT, I want a picture of this gorgeous hair so I make her stand in front of the Christmas tree and smile. The light hurts her wounded little eyes, so I tell her to "smile pretty and keep your eyes closed."